silent night? PLEASE?!?!

So downstairs in the living room there is an infernally tacky fake Christmas tree. Watching Enrique screw in each plastic branch was beyond hilarious for this girl, who grew up in the woods. The lights flash, the included ornaments are all the same, and the thing PLAYS MUSIC. If you can call it that-- it has a repertoire of six or seven Christmas songs, and plays no more than one chorus of each before seamlessly moving on to the next, all in that horrible a-rhythmic style of electronically synthesized monophonic crap. This thing plays constantly from dusk until bedtime-- or if Enrique falls asleep watching TV or listening to the radio, it never gets shut off. Mind you, it is a full two floors below and a whole house across from me, and I can't get "Jingle Bells" out of my damn head. UGH.